I appreciate this so much. It's pretty validating because I also wonder who am I to want things to be easier for me when they really don't need to be? But they kinda do. What a battle. I for sure have PDA, so this makes a lot of sense. Thank you for taking the time to share. So valuable.
So glad this has been helpful to you Ang, and thank you for your kind words 💕 As for needing things to be easier, I find it tricky when autism etc are largely 'invisible', especially in those of us who are more high-functioning. It feels wrong to ask for accommodations etc when I look 'normal'.
Thanks for this- I hadn’t heard of demand avoidance before. I will look into it more. It was interesting to consider your perspective on who am I to have a low demand lifestyle. I probably live a high demand lifestyle but my neurodivergent teen does the opposite. Lots to think about here!
As I read the mention about Demand Avoidance in your last article, I felt my attention perking up. I had never heard of it, yet it sounded... familiar. I scored "very likely" at the online test for PDA and chuckled to myself. It made so much sense and suddenly explained a lot of situations that I kept wondering about why they felt so challenging. Thank you so much for all the links to the various resources at the end of this article! It was really helpful to understand better, and to have some links to click on as a start, instead of overwhelming myself on Google searches.
Understanding what PDA is and that I'm displaying some of these behaviors comes with a sense of relief. There is also a lot of grief, for having "pushed through" all these years and been so hard on myself for not being "more performant like everyone else". That gives me some food for thought and fuel to write. ;)
I'm so glad you're finding the resources helpful - I overwhelmed myself so you didn't have to! lol. I'm glad it's led to better self-understanding, and hopefully more compassion and advocacy for yourself :)
The quiz was interesting, I hadn’t taken that one before. I kept waiting for the question “You find yourself arguing with the phrasing of each question on this quiz.” 😆 (i scored “likely”). The PDA lens has been very helpful for my family—while only one member fits within the more obvious “externalizing” presentation, we all benefit from an approach that centers our collective and individual felt sense of safety. That doesn’t sound like it should be that radical of an approach, but it often feels that way.
I appreciate this so much. It's pretty validating because I also wonder who am I to want things to be easier for me when they really don't need to be? But they kinda do. What a battle. I for sure have PDA, so this makes a lot of sense. Thank you for taking the time to share. So valuable.
So glad this has been helpful to you Ang, and thank you for your kind words 💕 As for needing things to be easier, I find it tricky when autism etc are largely 'invisible', especially in those of us who are more high-functioning. It feels wrong to ask for accommodations etc when I look 'normal'.
Thanks for this- I hadn’t heard of demand avoidance before. I will look into it more. It was interesting to consider your perspective on who am I to have a low demand lifestyle. I probably live a high demand lifestyle but my neurodivergent teen does the opposite. Lots to think about here!
Hi Serena, I hope you find the resources listed helpful! You might also find this post of mine interesting: https://open.substack.com/pub/neurodivergentnotes/p/living-a-low-demand-lifestyle?r=2kb9vk&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web
As I read the mention about Demand Avoidance in your last article, I felt my attention perking up. I had never heard of it, yet it sounded... familiar. I scored "very likely" at the online test for PDA and chuckled to myself. It made so much sense and suddenly explained a lot of situations that I kept wondering about why they felt so challenging. Thank you so much for all the links to the various resources at the end of this article! It was really helpful to understand better, and to have some links to click on as a start, instead of overwhelming myself on Google searches.
Understanding what PDA is and that I'm displaying some of these behaviors comes with a sense of relief. There is also a lot of grief, for having "pushed through" all these years and been so hard on myself for not being "more performant like everyone else". That gives me some food for thought and fuel to write. ;)
I'm so glad you're finding the resources helpful - I overwhelmed myself so you didn't have to! lol. I'm glad it's led to better self-understanding, and hopefully more compassion and advocacy for yourself :)
The quiz was interesting, I hadn’t taken that one before. I kept waiting for the question “You find yourself arguing with the phrasing of each question on this quiz.” 😆 (i scored “likely”). The PDA lens has been very helpful for my family—while only one member fits within the more obvious “externalizing” presentation, we all benefit from an approach that centers our collective and individual felt sense of safety. That doesn’t sound like it should be that radical of an approach, but it often feels that way.
Hi Taylor, so glad you found the resources helpful :)