Wired for connection

Digital Minimalism Diaries #11

From Eric Pickersgill’s photography project ‘Removed’

We are wired for connection, and I think we instinctively know that. We know we are meant to connect with other humans and live life alongside other people. Even for the most introverted amoung us, we are not meant to do life in solitary confinement. It’s as the Bible says—‘it is not good for man to be alone’ (Genesis 2:18).

Why, then, do we spend so much time on screens? Socializing and building connection with real humans can be hard work—they don't always like us or agree with us. Interacting with others via screens is alluring and addicting because there are no real consequences—if we don't like someone we can unfriend them, and if they don't like us we can block them. Screens give us a kind of ‘pseudo-connection’, as well as a sense of power and control over how we’re portrayed and perceived online. All of this makes screen-based interaction incredibly enticing, especially for a generation of people who don't know how to talk to each another and are afraid of other people (otherwise known as social anxiety). Screens have gradually replaced in-person connection and communication. The only problem is, it doesn't work.